I don't recognise the AP columnist's name; Bob Thomas was the regular movie/radio guy from the L.A. bureau at the time.
You’re All Wrong About Jack Benny
By RALPH DIGHTON
HOLLYWOOD. Nov. 1.—(AP)—Jack Benny is not bald.
Jack Benny is not stingy.
Jack Benny does not make Dennis Day mow his lawn.
That is, Jack is not completely bald, he is not as stingy as he pretends on his radio program, and he doesn’t exactly MAKE Dennis Day mow his lawn.
With age and dignity creeping up on him, radio’s gift to Waukegan (Benny actually was born in Chicago) currently is torn between two desires. He sometimes gets a little annoyed with the fiction he created in the minds of America’s listeners, but—he hates to toss aside a formula that has made him a fortune.
HOUSEHOLD NAMES
Benny has just signed a three-year contract, after 15 consecutive years on the radio. During that time, Jack Benny, Mary Livingston (his wife, Sadye Marks), Dennis Day,
Phil Harris and Rochester have become household words. In all those years, the program has followed a standard pattern. You knew what you hear would hear when you turned on Jack Benny.
But now, what the program will be like at the end of the contract, no one knows. Benny himself doesn’t know today what he’ll say on next week’s broadcast. Best guess (Benny’s) is that it will go on with “the same pattern and the same cast—unless we find something that’s really good.”
When Benny finds a gag that is good, he strings it out to the last gasp. The myth about his toupee started when he had to wear one for a movie. “But that’s nothing,” Jack says. “Practically every male star in Hollywood has to wear a hair piece of some sort—except Lassie.”
SECRET TWO-FOLD
The fabled miserliness had no such timely peg. It was first used, says Benny, “simply because it was a trait that any listener could recognize. It was an easy way to get laughs—every family has somebody who is pretty cheap.”
“The trouble,” Benny wails “is that my writers have made it so convincing that I get from 300 to 500 letters a week berating me for underpaying Dennis and Rochester.”
The secret of Mrs. Kubelsky’s little boy’s success, Jack believes, is two-fold.
First, he “gives ‘em lots of variety.” Unlike many other comedians, Jack likes to build up his supporting case. “A show with five stars in it is worth more than a show with one star.” he says. “And I don’t have to work so hard that way, people never get tired of any one character.”
The second reason for Benny’s professional longevity is that he does not regard his audience as a bunch of morons.
“Give ‘em a chance to play along with you.” he says. “They like it. There’s something in everybody that makes them love to play theater with you. They’ll believe you while you’re on the air—just for the fun they get out of it.”
NEW ANGLE
Jack was following this theory when he tried a new twist in a phone conversation with his “sponsor” last year. The “sponsor” supposedly was bawling him out for firing a singing-commercial quartet. The script went something like this:
(Silence—while sponsor is talking.)
Benny: But—
(15 seconds silence while sponsor is talking.)
Benny: But—
(15 seconds silence.)
Benny: But—
(15 seconds silence.)
Benny: But—
Then the band blared, ending the program, and Benny had kept an audience of supposedly several millions supposedly laughing for a full minute—without saying anything.
- JACK CAST.PNG (232.23 KiB) Viewed 6400 times
transcribed by yhtapmys