by Jhammes » Thu Aug 24, 2006 8:34 am
(The home of Debbie Harry: Jack Benny and Debbie Harry walk inside)
Jack: Thank you for such a pleasant lunch. And it was so nice of you to pick up the check!
Debbie: Your welcome, Mr. Benny. Actually, the waiter arrived, you went through your pockets for ten minutes, I really had no choice.
Jack: Hmm...
Debbie: Actually, I would be delighted to record your song! It would give me "Rapture"...
Jack: Oh, good, good...I've been looking for just the right person, someone with, maybe, just a little edge, but still honest and sentimental, don't you know.
(Band members walk in; a guitarist, bassist, and keyboardist)
Debbie: Well, Mr. Benny, you know show business. There is always some showmanship, some exaggeration, but I have always found it is really best to just be yourself!
Jack: I agree, and you certainly are a very thoughtful, gentle person
...who are these people...?
Debbie: Oh, that's part of our group...we're rehearsing later on.
Jack: So, you WILL do "When You Say I Beg Your Pardon, Then I'll come Back To You"? You won't forget, now will you?
Debbie: I promise that "One Way Or Another, I'm gonna find you,
I'm gonna getcha!"
(Jack smirks at camera)
Band member guitarist: Debbie, are you sure we have to? "When You Say I Beg Your Pardon" makes me want to...
Debbie (sharply): AHH, SHADDUP!! I'M THE LEADER, WHAT I SAY, GOES!!
Jack: My goodness...
Debbie: (sweetly smiling): Now Mr. Benny, don't mind him...we're planning an overseas tour...nervous tension, you know..
Jack: Oh, I know all about nerves... people say I have the biggest nerve
(weak laugh).
Band member bassist: Debbie, I don't see how "Yakety Sax" fits our image...
Debbie (sharply):THAT'S ANOTHER BENNY! THIS BENNY IS CLASSY, FAMILY MATERIAL!! GET A LIFE, THEN GET SOME BRAINS ALREADY!!
Jack: Oh, dear...
Debbie (smiling sweetly): What can I do with them, Mr. Benny? HE became interested in music through a distant relative...
Jack: Really?
Debbie:Yes...I think his name was... Remley...
Jack:Oh,...oh,...well, since you all here, why not just record my song now? I have my violin with me...
Debbie: Mr. Benny, we can't do that today... that would have to be later...
Jack (disappointed):I know, I know..."don't call us, we'll call you..."
Band member keyboardist: Oh, it's not that... you see, we still have to rehearse our songs for the tour...
Band member guitarist: And we have to record telephone and satellite interviews, with TV hosts and radio disc jockeys, for each city on the
tour...
Debbie: That could take all day, maybe all night...but Mr. Benny, I am DETERMINED to record your song...it WILL happen when we get back
to the states!
Jack: So, what you are saying, is ...
Debbie: "CALL ME"!
(Jack turns, smiles at camera)